Homeland Security File

The Government is there to protect us from hipster douchebags. They've started files, detailed monitoring, and a sterilization program. This generation may be lost, but the bastards won't be able to breed!

Comments

[douchealert]

Hey, that guy looks familiar. Was he in a motorcycle accident? Uncanny resemblance.

[Cannibal]

Hey Douchealert,

Good eye, sir! You might have a career in the new and exciting field of, "Douche Spotting."

Would you interested in having us send you an informational DVD / survey to evaluate your ability?

[douchealert]

While douche spotting abilities are uncanny (as are yours, sir), I only do it on a freelance basis.

[Cannibal]

It's not a career choice for everybody.

But as you start to see the douchebags overrunning your country, state, city, and town... As you start to see them take jobs that could have gone to other, non douche, folks... You ask yourself if you could have stopped it from happening.

Just try to sleep, knowing that you could have acted.